As a business and mindset coach for women, I walk my talk; endeavouring to be a light in the world. But something wild happened this past weekend that tested me and my high vibes. I got my first hater. Like full on "I don't like you and will not respect you" hate.
Allow me to explain...
- She downloaded my freebie
- Took screenshots of the email
- Highlighted my mistakes (legit, highlighted the grammatical errors)
- Sent me an FB message, addressing me as Brenda
- Pitched her proofreading services on the back of highlighting my errors and calling me Brenda
I told her that I was offended by her strategy of essentially highlighting my mistakes without first introducing herself and attracting me to her services with amazing content.
She did not like this.
She proceeded to tell me that I do not know how to receive, that my coaches/mentors would be ashamed of my inability to take feedback AND that she felt sorry for you- my tribe- for having to put up with, in her opinion, my illegible content.
We had our exchange and I thought it was done.
FAST FORWARD to yesterday, I went live in the Best Life Mastery FB Group about confidence, and she started again in my group, in the comments on my live video. Which brings me to todays point...
How To Stick Up For Yourself...with INTEGRITY
Stick to the Facts
Many people lose arguments because they cannot stick to the facts. Stick to the point. If you're offended, explain why. Don't call into question anything else (character etc.), because this is fighting dirty and WE are better than that.
This was very challenging because I really wanted to tell her where to go, especially because she was poking and poking and poking.
Staying calm and being clear and confident with your point ensures that you get heard AND that you are able to leave the situation with integrity. Or at the very least you tried.
When you bring heat to the situation, the only good that can come of it is more heat. Stay cool ;)
Know When to Walk Away
Much like my hater, most haters love to have the last word. Let them have it. Say your piece, declare what will not be tolerated and move on. Do not negotiate with terrorists!
Ultimately they look foolish when they keep going; let them make fools of themselves while you bow out with grace.
As you RISE to your best life and business, and put yourself out there, people WILL come for you; people get jealous, it's part and parcel with being a woman on the rise. And the true measure of a woman on the rise is being able to confidently stand up for herself and stay in integrity.
BTW I kicked this woman out of my group and off this list. Not because I don't appreciate feedback, but because I WILL NOT tolerate disrespect- ain't nobody got time for that!