I wanted to write this post for anyone who is trying to force themselves into a perceived healthy box; and it’s not working. This post is for those who are dealing with an undiagnosed monster and feeling like they are eating “all the right things” to no avail. I was you. I see you. I hear. I know your pain. I hope this post is a light if you need it.
I have autoimmune disease eczema, which is still hard for me to say. I’ve always considered myself a healthy woman; I mean, I’ve studied nutrition and I’m a chef who ran a healthy catering company- in short, I was/am by all standards, a healthy woman.
So when I started to break out into a rash, starting small, that then began to cover my body, I doubled down on the healthy food I ate, certain this was part of the solution. I cut the usual suspects like dairy, grains, coffee, booze and found no relief, instead the rashes got worse.
Determined as I am, I filled my body MORE of the “good” stuff, in an effort to resolve my autoimmune eczema (which I didn’t know this was at the time). I ate all the healthy foods; antioxidant rich berries, healing spices like turmeric and cinnamon and every hydrating and nourishing vegetable I could get my paws on. And nothing.
As you well know (if you don’t, read my whole journey here) it took over 18 months for me to get clarity and a diagnosis of Lichen Planus Eczema, and with this I learned that I have a VERY severe- severe enough to cause autoimmune issues- chemical food allergy to salicylates.
Revising my diet to heal my Lichen Planus was EYE OPENING, because almost every food in my “healthy” diet was hurting me. My morning coffee with heaps of coconut milk (high salicylates) and cinnamon (one of the highest levels of salicylates), in addition to my daily turmeric elixir with berries (staggering amount of salicylates) were spiraling my immune system every time I opened my mouth.
This whole paradigm shift really messed with my head, because what I thought was universally healthy, wasn’t healthy for me or my eczema condition. Having spent almost a year not eating grains, or dairy, I have to admit there was a bit of hubris there, like “I eat sooooo healthy”; so when gluten rich grains and dairy became super safe foods, even though my body was like “yes please” my mindset took a beat to catch up.
I have to come clean and admit that having an autoimmune disease embarrassed me and made me feel as though I caused this problem, “did my hard partying twenties cause this?”, “did I eat too many salicylates?”, and most dubious of all “why is my body broken?” Eventually I had to let this go, looking back serves no one.
Even though I felt EXTREME guilt for making wheat flour pancakes, or having regular semolina pasta, the guilt tasted AMAZING. I was scared I would gain weight, or I would break out, which all proved to be untrue; and because of these feelings of fear I resisted change. Despite being stubborn my eczema started to clear up, I had energy like I didn’t have before, despite having previously eating as “clean” as ever; and my healing body was healing my wellness weary mind, which needed a break after a year plus of dealing with undiagnosed autoimmune disease.
To conclude, there is no right or wrong way to eat, and admitting this to myself was hard, but it was made easier over a bowl of gluten rich pasta. And to tell you the truth, it’s freeing to appreciate the foods that I had once labeled as “bad”; and I’m back to doing what I do best, eating!
Note: the Failsafe, Salicylate Free Eczema Diet is NOT easy, so please don’t think that it is; I can only attest to it being MY healing diet- luckily it wasn’t forever. I wish you much success in finding yours.